Study Finds 97% of Offense Comes From People Looking For Something to Be Offended By
A groundbreaking new study released by the Institute of Social Sensitivity has revealed that 97% of all modern offense is
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Thursday, May 14, 2026
Latest:
- Experts Warn Saying ‘Good Job’ Creates Unfair Performance Expectations
- Neighborhood Declares Curfews ‘Authoritarian’ — Teens Now Governed by Vibes
- Nationwide Study Finds Most Adults Are Just Exhausted From Pretending This All Makes Sense
- City Renames ‘Failure’ as ‘Pre-Success’ to Improve Morale
- Museum Removes Historical Timeline — Visitors Free to Experience the Past in Any Order They Feel
Experts Warn Americans Not To Think Too Hard — Critical Thinking Now Considered a Threat to Public Harmony
A coalition of national experts issued a public advisory this week warning Americans to avoid critical thinking unless supervised by
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School District Removes the Alphabet for Being ‘Too Letterist’ — Students Encouraged to Use Interpretive Sounds Instead
The Willowdale Unified School District announced sweeping changes this week after determining that the traditional alphabet is “too letterist” and
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Pantone Announces ‘Cloud White’ as Color of the Year — Activists Immediately Declare It Racist
Pantone, the global authority on color, unveiled its highly anticipated Color of the Year this week: a soft, airy shade
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Activists Demand Removal of Sunlight Because It ‘Excludes the Nocturnally Inclined’
A coalition of progressive activists has filed a petition demanding the city reduce or eliminate natural sunlight, arguing that sunlight
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Streaming Service Introduces ‘Trigger Warning’ Before Ads — But Not For Content, For You Accidentally Buying Something
Streaming platform ViewWave+ announced a groundbreaking new safety feature this week: Trigger Warnings before every advertisement — not because the
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Local Child Surprised to Learn Her Friends Are Now Adults Because Schools Changed Grades to ‘Feelings Levels’
Chaos erupted at Meadowbrook Elementary this week after eight-year-old student Lily Marsh discovered that her classmates were suddenly considered adults
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Man Complains He Can’t Smile Without Offending Someone — Town Declares Grinning Illegal Until Further Notice
Residents of Harmony Falls were stunned this week after the town council officially banned smiling following a complaint that one
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Portland Unveils 75-Foot Christmas Tree, Immediately Insists It’s Not a Christmas Tree — Just ‘The Tree’
Portland, Oregon kicked off the holiday season this week with the ceremonial lighting of a 75-foot-tall Christmas tree — though
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Spartan Moms Sent Their Sons to War—Today’s Woke Moms Send Theirs to Timeout for Using the Wrong Crayon
Historians this week released a shocking comparison between ancient Spartan mothers and modern progressive “woke moms,” concluding that the two
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