Alert Issued: Salvation Army Red Kettle Bell Ringers Suspected of Seasonal Non-Compliance
Smiling while asking for charity may violate several unspoken cultural rules. As the holiday season approaches, concerned observers are once
Read More
Wednesday, May 13, 2026
Latest:
- Experts Warn Saying ‘Good Job’ Creates Unfair Performance Expectations
- Neighborhood Declares Curfews ‘Authoritarian’ — Teens Now Governed by Vibes
- Nationwide Study Finds Most Adults Are Just Exhausted From Pretending This All Makes Sense
- City Renames ‘Failure’ as ‘Pre-Success’ to Improve Morale
- Museum Removes Historical Timeline — Visitors Free to Experience the Past in Any Order They Feel
Breaking: Christmas Declared Problematic—Joy Under Review
Santa placed on administrative leave pending investigation. Just days before Christmas, a coalition of Very Serious People has raised concerns
Read More
History Textbooks Updated: America Founded in 2015 After a Group Project
Founders downgraded to problematic footnotes. In a bold step toward modernizing education, history textbooks nationwide have been updated to reflect
Read More
City Council Votes to Replace ‘Right and Wrong’ With ‘Personal Interpretive Outcomes’
In a unanimous decision applauded by everyone present (enthusiastically and without hesitation), the Brookhaven City Council voted to officially replace
Read More
Experts Say Talking to Your Own Kids Too Much May Undermine Their TikTok Authority
Parents across the nation are being urged to step back, stay quiet, and stop interfering after experts warned that excessive
Read More
America Introduces ‘National Quiet Hour’ — Silence Required So No One Is Accidentally Offended
In a sweeping move toward nationwide emotional safety, federal officials announced the creation of National Quiet Hour, a daily, mandatory
Read More
New App Alerts Users When They’re About to Have a Thought Outside Approved Narratives
Tech startup MindGuard™ unveiled a groundbreaking new app this week designed to alert users just before they think something unapproved.
Read More
School Cafeteria Eliminates Lunch Menu — Students Choose Meals Based on Identity
In an effort to make lunchtime more inclusive, the Brookside Unified School District announced it has officially eliminated cafeteria menus,
Read More
Weather Declared Offensive — Activists Demand Climate Be More Emotionally Predictable
In a stunning rebuke of nature itself, a coalition of climate justice activists announced this week that weather is officially
Read More
New Study Finds Discipline Causes Trauma; Chaos Officially Declared a Learning Style
A groundbreaking new study released this week by the National Institute for Progressive Education has concluded that discipline is traumatic,
Read More